This is a long one, but a fun one 🙂 This actually happened this time last year. Amanda came for a visit in October with a couple friends. For months she’d been talking about wanting a 5mm semicircle wing/voi pair and about a month before her parents had contacted me about wanting to get her something Dyed4you as a gift. So I filled them in on what she’d been longing for and planted an idea the Father dropped in my heart – have Amanda dye her own gift without knowing it was for her. 🙂
I’ll let Amanda share the story from her perspective:
I went to visit Meghan last October. On the Friday morning I was there we were standing on her back patio chatting about the orders that were to be dye that evening. One of the orders was for a wing/voi combo and the customer requested they not match. I kind of laughed because that’s exactly what I’ve been wanting.
Meghan asked if the Lord was been speaking to me about these. I saw blue & red and described what I was sensing. It was Commanding Authority. She asked about the other one and all I could see was blues and it the word was along the same lines as the other wing. After some bantering about it we knew it was Declaring the Word of the Lord.
It was SO fun that the two together were speaking a VERY powerful word over whomever was getting these. Later in the afternoon when we were praying about the orders and hearing what the Lord wanted for each, Meghan asked if there was anything else that the Lord was speaking to me about the wings or perhaps the person receiving them. I shared what I sensed the Lord was saying and it was in addition to the silks’ letters.
I must be honest. When I was talking to Meghan about these from the time on the patio to pre-dyeing, I felt like I was speaking over myself. It was an unfamiliar sensation to me…prophesying over myself? But these aren’t mine, Lord! There were a few things I didn’t share with her because honestly, I thought it was flesh and not the Lord. My hearts desire was exactly what someone was ordering and thought my flesh was in the way.
Later that evening, we started the pre-dyeing process and she said that she was going to record me dyeing the wing/voi combo. I remember her mentioning that she had waited until I was there to dye these and thought it would be fun for the person purchasing these to see me do it. That DEFINITELY peaked my curiosity quite a bit and I started asking a whole lot of questions.
Of course I asked who bought them and Meghan said she couldn’t tell me but she was certain there’d be a scarf story by the end of December. My brain started going through a ton of scenarios. I started asking her…is it for Tami or Angie? Is it for Kiara? Maybe Julie or Dr Mel? Maybe it was someone back here in Ohio like Kim or Anne! My mind was racing with all the people I knew from Dyed4you that might be ordering these, and would want to see me dye these.
Then the thought occurred to me again, maybe someone ordered these as a gift for me. Ok, yeah, that’s stretching it because who would do that??? Maybe Brandon (my husband) did as a surprise? Hmm…I didn’t know but I was starting to wonder. We started dyeing the wing/voi, and Meghan took video.
I can’t remember at what point I asked, but I paused from dyeing and asked Meghan “Are these for me?” She looked at me kind of wide eyed and said “Why would you think that?” I started to answer her but my phone rang and it was my husband so I got distracted and dropped it. We finished dyeing, and I was super tired. I went to bed still wondering about them.
The next morning I woke up and was eager to see all the finished silks. As I went downstairs, I could feel the presence of the Lord all around me. It was one of those moments I thought that if I turned around I’d see Him. I went over and looked at one I had bought for myself and He quickly said “This is not yours” and then told me who to give it to. I was a little bummed just because it was a beautiful silk but I knew the person would love it and that blesses me more 🙂
So then I started looking at all of them and was so excited about them. They were all SO beautiful! I purposefully waited until the end to look at the wing/voi’s. I picked up Commanding Authority and I can’t describe what came over me. I was shaking under His presence it was so strong. I held the wing up and clear as day there was a white “A” in the middle.
How in the WORLD did that happen!? There’s no way any white could have remained on the wing. It was completely saturated with color when I dyed it. I heard as clear as day “That “A” is for you. These are yours”. I kneeled down on the floor and spread the wing out. “No way. How can these be mine?”
I really didn’t understand what was going on because I knew His voice, but I started thinking perhaps I was selfishly and greedily trying make circumstances fit my hearts desire. I was already in emotional and mental upheaval from a very recent event that the Lord allowed to trigger me. I just sat on the floor staring at them crying. I tried to dismiss what I had just heard, and bury it. I prayed over the wings, placed them back where they had hung, and went upstairs.
When Meghan woke up, I asked her if she had seen the “A” and she said she hadn’t. We looked at them together and it took everything in me not to cry in front of her. I wanted to ask her again if these were for me, but I didn’t because I decided in me heart, if these were for me, then I’ll receive them when He wants me to. Otherwise, whomever got them was gointo be super blessed! Anyways, Meghan looked at it and said, “A for authority!” Inside, I really wanted to tell her what i felt I heard the Lord say.
Later on, we went to the park to video me using them. I was SO IN LOVE with them! The wind wasn’t cooperating and we were getting ready to pack up and go. I asked Meghan if I could use Commanding Authority one more time. I couldn’t help it. My heart was nearly bursting holding the wing and I just wanted to worship with it one more time before letting it go to whomever bought it. And that’s the video she ended up posting on here.
The next day was time for me to go home. I got to help anoint and pray over the silks including the wing/voi. It was a wonderful moment. I was very attached to these now, lol, and I was very curious as to what the story would be with these.
So that was October. For 3-4 weeks after I thought if they were mine, I’d surely get them before Thanksgiving. Nothing came. I finally resolved that I didn’t hear from Him, and that it was my selfish flesh. I asked Meghan every once in awhile if there was a scarf story yet and who bought them. Same thing every time…she was 99% sure there would be a story and if it wasn’t given my New Years, she’d tell me. Fast forward to 12/24/10.
I had finished the dance at church and me and my family headed over to my aunts house to open presents. As soon as we got there my mom was in a huge hurry for me to watch a DVD she made. She was almost frantic to get it started and the DVD player wouldn’t work. So, my husband got the portable DVD player from our car and my mom gave it to me to watch. All the sudden there are two video cameras recording me watching this DVD and my brother has a camera taking pictures. I obviously knew something was up.
On the DVD screen the words Commanding Authority appear and then the video of me worshiping with the wing at the park, and then the words “we love you and are so proud of you, love Mom & Dad”. I looked up to find my mom and she was standing there with a present in her hands. I opened it and started crying.
A whirlwind of thoughts went through my head. The whole weekend in October with Meghan flashed through my mind, all the times I kept asking Meghan about them, and then I remembered that moment in the basement when I saw the “A” in the wing and what God had said.
There were 3 letters in the box, one of which was what I had told Meghan I felt the Lord was saying to include for the receipent. Remember earlier I said that when I was telling Meghan what the Lord was saying in addition to the scarf letter that it felt like I was prophesying over myself? Imagine reading the words back during this moment. Then I started remembering when Meghan and I had finished videoing me with wing at the park. She was crying and I couldn’t really understand why. I knew why now 🙂 I sat there with the wings in my hands just crying. They really were mine, wow!
The thing is, the last person I would have ever thought to buy these for me, bought these for me…my mom :*-) I obviously don’t have time to write my personal testimony, but she and I have never really had a relationship at all in my 30 years of life. Always at odds, not liking each other, not speaking to each other, etc. Even after I was born again 7 years ago, God has had to do a huge work in me in order for me to start liking and loving my mom again.
Not until late 2010 did things really progress and she and I have started having a relationship again. This gift was incredibly precious to me and even more so coming from my mom. Along with the wing/voi’s, my mom made a book of all the email interactions between her and Meghan about these!
The first page of the book was a very, very personal letter from my mom that said how proud she was of me, she loved me, and she acknowledged how evident it is that Jesus has changed and moved in my life in such big ways. Again, I can’t even describe what kind of healing and restoration this has brought!
The last thing that happened was the next day. I had time to just sit and reflect on all of this. I learned that I really had heard the Lord’s voice say these were mine back in October. This was an exercise and learning experience for me. It was teaching me to know that I hear/heard Him and His promise, being fully assured that He loves me and wants to give me my hearts desire, and then being patient and not anxious on His timing of when to receive.It’s all about letting go and trusting Him.
It also taught me not to put God in a box about how the promise will be delivered because again, I never would have thought it would be my mom. And not only was the promise of my hearts desire to have the wing/voi’s for myself, but also a restored relationship with my mom.
These wings also come at a time where the Lord is wanting me to start “getting” what it is He’s called me to do. The wings are called Commanding Authority and Declaring the Word of the Lord…. together named Undeniable Authority. There’s so much I could write on this alone, but 2011 is a year of tremendous shifts in me and I can’t wait to see what’s going to happen!
I find it interesting the Father waited nearly a year for me to post this blog. As I’ve reflected on why, I realize that some of it is because the fruit of what the LORD has done is so evident in Amanda’s life. This year has been one filled with trials, as growth times frequently are, but she’s come out the other side refined and shining like purified gold. It’s such an honor to have her as a friend and as a part of this ministry 🙂
Since she’s coming for a visit – stay tuned for more great video 😉